Friday, March 30, 2007

Rudy McScroogles - TBTMNS Response

Dear Mr. McScroogles,

I am quite flattered by your interest in wanting to eat my spleen, and I am sure I speak for my wide audience when I say that they too are flattered.

Since your initial contact, I have done extensive research on the human spleen, as well as the gall bladder and the appendix that you stated you would also accept.

Unfortunately, I can not offer you any of the aforementioned internal organs at this time. They all seem to serve a purpose (except perhaps my appendix), and to be honest, I have grown quite fond of them during the course of the past 32 years.

I will let you know if I have a falling out with any of those organs and change my mind regarding their edibility. In the meantime, I wish you the best of luck with your spleen endevours, and urge you not to be a stranger to the TBTMNS community.

Kindest Regards,

TBTMNS

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Rudy, you may not eat my spleen. My spleen is very important to me, as it is literally very close to my heart. Also my stomach. So please back off, *******.

Rudy, you may not eat my gall bladder either. I need it to store my bile until it is used to digest the food I recently ate. For example, some crappy tasting cookies, beef'n'cheese nachos, and some white rice. It is shaped like a pear, and if you intend to eat my gall bladder in one bite, then you may experience trouble swallowing it all. Oh, and speaking of which, it contains 50 ml of bile that is extra concentrated after being in the gall bladder, so unless you have some fats you want to use this bile to emulsify, it would be really risky to consume all this bile along with the actual gall bladder. So, back off *******! Thanks to Wikipedia for the info.

Oh, but you can have my appendix, Rudy...as soon as I get appendicitis and need to have it removed. But I figure the damn thing will be pretty diseased if it comes down with appendicitis, so I'm pretty sure you won't want it. Even if you don't mind, it's still in my body. So until then, back off, *******!