Saturday, October 1, 2011


"Can you throw some extra bread in there? The Italian Bread? The stuff that usually comes with the entrees?"
"You want more bread?"
"Yeah man. I love bread." Chuckles. "Let me put it this way: I weigh almost 500 pounds. I would guess that 90% of that is bread. I fucking love bread. It's so fucking good."
"Whoa - I know how you feel. I love bread too. It's awesome. But I'm not 500 pounds."
"Haha kid - you probably won't ever be. It takes a lot of hard work to get here. You don't just wake up one morning and you weigh 500 pounds."
"Everybody wants to rule the world."
"That is true. Goodbye."

Friday, May 27, 2011


for many of my loyal fans out there, the past few years have been long, painful collections of seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, and years filled with nothing but empty clicks of the refresh button.

a lot of sand has slipped through the hourglass of life. much water has passed under the bridge. much hair has fallen from my head.

many loaves of bread have been broken. many tears have been cried. an equally large number of babies have been belched. a dog named 'frodo' was also run over. i didn't do it.

but here is some good news: a ray of sunshine: a glimmer of hope: a cupcake filled with happiness and jesus.

the blog that makes no sense (tbtmns) is dusting off it's dust. it's awakening from its sleep induced slumber, drawing back the curtains, stretching its virtual arms and yawning. then it's going back to bed for 9 minutes. then it will wake up again, hit snooze, go back to bed and then it will wake up and give birth to itself once again!

check back. tbtmns is coming for you (but only if you're hot. and a woman.).

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

hahaha! you thought i was vanquished "from" the blogsphere. well, my one armed, runny-eyed sniveling were wrong!

unfortunately, everyone else who that doesn't describe was right...


rudy mcscroogles

P.S. - I don't even know punctuation?